Old Memories and a New Miracle – A Poem About Love

I wrote this poem on 21.10.02. Those days I always wrote the date whenever I wrote poems. I don’t have to do that anymore because now I am posting my new poems in  Facebook and WordPress which already show the dates posted. Anyway, this was written 18 years before (and when I was about 18 years old) and I thought I had really lost it. I was looking for it, even though I wasn’t focusing much on that. One reason why I thought I had lost the poem is because I posted it online on a content writing website and they closed the site six years before.

Anyway, today I was simply going to my own old notebooks, to see which one would get my attention first; and the poem that I thought I had lost, was the first thing that I noticed among several hundred pieces of papers. It made me smile, because for me it was a miracle.

(Even though the topic of the poem seems to be romantic love, it is really an unconscious longing for maternal love).

A dark rainy blanket has wrapped the earth;

A gloomy round, the day has given birth;

I am here, thinking calmly about my love,

Starring without a blink, the long rainbow.

The season has scattered dark black patches;

People, for heat, are searching for matches;

In their small, simple homes of road corner;

They are like goats; those are missed by their owner.

Like they, myself too, do not know my way;

Her hot thoughts burn me like the days of May;

All green trees and grasses murmur her name;

And each drop of beauty describes her fame;

A year has passed since I met her in road;

When her lips were off in the ‘patience’ mode;

She was standing still without a response;

Which hurts my heart now, like a twig of thorns.

She made some frequent visits in my dreams;

And showed her mystic face of golden beams;

I thought it was true and opened my eyes;

I cursed my dreams; they told a lakh of lies.

Each minute seems to be a grave for joy;

In the hands of love, I am a playtime toy;

Each of my verse tries to make her figure;

They fail, tasting like milk without sugar.

When I was twelve, I met her in my school;

And wondered to see the sun which was cool;

For the first time, I lost myself in the air.

And thought, “She will be the best one to care”;

Is it possible for a rose to speak?

Have you seen singing snow on any peak?

Do you think a moon can walk with a wave?

She spoke, sang, walked and also dug my grave.

She was a good friend for the first three years;

Like all others who shared my smiles and tears;

The fourth year awaited me with a curse;

To cure the wound it gave me, she should nurse.

It was when she sat near me in the bench;

With each of her looks carrying a pinch;

My childish wish searched love in all her signs;

And tried to follow her face-printed lines.

She read my verses, laughed and chatted with me!

And made me like a honey-sucking bee;

That chants and begs before a new blossom;

And soon my hidden love fought for freedom;

My tender love troubled me when I slept;

For endless heights, my passion was a lift;

My hasty lips hurried to propose her;

My legs pulled me to wander here and there.

Like a dove that has just cheated the cage;

My thoughts flew and filled a short poetic page;

Which I gave her, after checking the time.

My fear flashed in my face like a milky lime.

Her answer peeped out as a fruity smile;

Seeing that, my heart stood still for a while;

But I could notice the bond getting loose;

My feeling broke, throwing away the screws.

Each ‘today’ was worse than yesterday;

My path became a thorny jungle way;

Yes! She denied me and left me in hell;

A cruel beauty has marked me as ‘null’.

My heart carried the load of love with pain;

My thousands of verses gave me no gain;

I believed that she will change her dry mind;

That belief took the next four years to grind.

The stars began to laugh at me during nights;

The sun teased me with hot fingery lights;

I blamed myself for being such a slave;

Who is arrested in a dirty cave.

All those recollections have crowded in;

Each of those thoughts are carrying a pin.

To pierce my heart and taste it’s beating flesh.

In this dark time, they are making a crush.

The Supreme Artist – A Poem

There is a painting in the evening sky;
There is an interesting drama in life;
There is music in the sound of birds…
And there is poetry hidden inside all of the above….

This universe is a work of art. We have all been created as a work of art; God as the essence of universe is the source of this art and God as the beautiful personification is the supreme artist.

– Shanmugam P

The Pleasure Is All Mine – English Poem

(A poem that I wrote on October 22, 2019)

May be you’ve been living somewhere close by;
May be I won’t see you until I die;
May be you live abroad, across the sea,
And may be you forgot all about me!

May be, after years, I’ll see you one day;
May be I’ll meet you when my hair turns grey;
As we shake hands you’ll see my wrinkled skin,
And you may say something that’ll make me grin.

May be that day you’d like to talk to me,
And share the nostalgic feelings with glee;
May be we’ll have a lot to laugh and talk;
And may be we’ll go for a chatty walk!

May be this all will remain a pipe dream,
No matter how awesome this all may seem!
But, so what? I hope you’re happy and fine!
If you’re happy, the pleasure is all mine!

The Pleasure Is All Mine - English Poem

You made me to die – Poem

Like a smart scientist you tested me;
To see if I deserve this sea of glee!
You put me through hurdles and throbbing pain;
To handle them, you gave me a smart brain!

When I cried, you gave me a light of hope;
I climbed the mountain of life with your rope!
After the pain of all those gloomy days,
Everywhere I saw your most gracious face!

I went to the temple and I felt your grace;
In church, you showed me your glittering face;
Near mosques, I heard your deep,majestic sound;
There were no bounds for the joy that I found!

The words fall short, when I try to thank you;
You made me to die and raised me anew!
I died to the past and woke up in God;
You cured the lifelong mental pain that gnawed!

Without knowing your oneness, people fight;
They fight for just names and forget your light;
To tell them the truth, empower my soul!
I submit to you! Your will is my goal!

Love and Greed – My Poem

This poem is based on an incident that happened in my school. The teacher mentioned in the poem is Mrs. Usha Raman who is the principal of the school I studied in Sankarnagar, Tirunelveli. If you join the first letters of all the lines, you will get the sentence, ‘Mrs. Usha Raman is my guru’.

Mrs. Usha Raman, Jayendra School

“Madam, kindly help me with your wisdom!

Restless is my mind, I am stupid and dumb!

Say something that will calm my greedy mind!

Unhappy I am”, I grumbled and whined.

She was aware that I was dumb and blind.

Her words were clear, supportive and kind!

And she knew that I had a high school crush.

Roasted by my greed, I was in a rush.

As I helplessly looked, with a soft voice

My teacher said, “True love never destroys

And never hurts; you have greed! It’s not love!

No one is spoiled because of true love!

It is greed which will destroy you indeed!

So pray and ask God to transform your greed!

May your greed transform into loving care!

You’ll find true joy in compassion, I swear!”

Growing up, I reflected on her words;

Until one day I became free like birds!

Real love doesn’t want to possess or own!

Undoubtedly, by pure love, God is known!

It’s Your Road & Your Road Alone – Poem

your road-rumi

(A poem based on the quotes of Rumi)

Dear reader, don’t you love these rhyming lines
Of verses through which a mystic light shines?
These words are like a sailing antique ship
And their meaning is the sea for that trip!

Where are you racing to? My loving friend!
Trust me, those wild cravings don’t have an end;
The wealth within you is your grand kingdom;
My friend, there you can taste the true freedom!

Let yourself become a wise, living verse
That wears metaphors and flies to excurse;
Trust your heart! deep down, it does know the way;
Run in that direction, you’ll find the ray!

Don’t worry about what these people think;
Sing like the sparrows, dance, rejoice and drink!
It’s your road and yours alone; walk with joy!
Life is a drama and world is a toy!

– Shanmugam p

An Ode To The Night – An English Poem

I wrote this poem just today:

ode to the night - poem - Copy.png

Dear night! you’re beautiful at the fall of twilight,
When the reddish sky grabs our sense of sight,
When the sky gets smeared with a blackish tint
And when the trees become dark like a flint.

You’re made more charming by the milky moon,
when the adorning stars form a commune;
When the lights are off, you become darker,
Mystic, and scary like a strange stalker.

Your mystic murk at the witching hour
Touches and wakes up the midnight flower;
When the night blooming lilies rise and smile
And when the streat dogs howl, once in a while.

You start to retire at the early dawn
When the clouds get a shade of red and fawn,
When the tweets of robins bid you fairwell,
And when the temples ring the morning bell.

As the sun rises, you start to vanish,
When the eastern sky shines like a gold fish;
We look forward to seeing you again
When we call it a day and stop our strain.

  • Shanmugam P (Written on 03 August, 2018)

The Day When I First Set My Eyes On You – A Poem

A poem that I wrote many years before:

poem

The day when I first set my eyes on you,
Each of your eyes looked like a drop of dew.
Showing a fear in those dark round pupils
And a look as sharp as tall church steeples!

You began to speak but it was so rare;
Sometimes all that came from your mouth is air
Even if you spoke it was soft and mild,
With voice that sounded like a little child!

I had always wished if there was a clue
To find out what locked your lips with a glue
And I always wanted to ask you why
you were so calm, gentle, reserved and shy!

Slowly you gathered the courage to smile;
But still you were far like a lonely isle;
Shortly you began to laugh and giggle;
Not once did you shout, argue or niggle!

Like a wide, calm sea with turquoise waters
Or a big lake with fishes and yachters,
Your glance was enticing, mystic and deep
Beyond which loads of secrets were asleep!

Sometimes I wonder why lilies don’t speak
And marvel at the daisies near a creek,
Inquiring why they don’t utter a phrase;
Like you, they just remain silent and gaze!

The Song Of A Rain Cloud – My Poem

The Song Of The Rain Cloud.png

The Song of a Rain Cloud

I’m a dark rain cloud in the boundless sky

Pouring out rain wherever I pass by;

I move gently, swayed by the evening breeze,

Past the gardens, streams, and mountains with ease.

 

I was born without a dad or a mom;

I don’t have a name or a concrete form;

I give myself to make the flowers bloom;

To quench your thirst, I dismantle my plume.

 

I know no predefined path or a map;

As rain, I allow myself to unwrap;

When I lose my form, I persist to be

As every drop in every deep, wide sea.

 

I’m in every drop of water you drink;

Through the morning dew drops, I smile and wink;

Of the watery blood that fills your heart,

A dead old rain cloud is also a part!

–  Shanmugam. P

You are the Truth – A Poem about Non-duality

Here is my recent poem about non-duality or advaita, which has some pointers to contemplate for anyone who is seeking the truth:

You are the Truth - The Essential Wisdom of Advaita
You are the Truth – The Essential Wisdom of Advaita

The poem in the above image is a part of the longer poem that I wrote later.. I expanded the above poem to make it a part of a story which is metaphoric and reveals the essence of the ancient teachings.. It combines the vedantic teachings, mindfulness and verses from the Bible:

You are the Truth

Carrying the weight of past in my head
And dragging the scenes which were old and dead,
I ran to grab the bliss of the future;
The more I ran, the more was the torture..

The torture of the hedonic treadmill
Followed me as I continued uphill;
I was caught in the prison of craving
With tedious thoughts, my mind was raving.

I met an ugly old man on the way
who had a long thick beard with shades of grey.
His face was shining with heavenly bliss;
In his eyes I saw an endless abyss!

“What makes you so happy in this rat race?”,
I asked him as he slowly turned his face.
He replied,”The answer is within you!
The grand kingdom of God is within you!”

“That’s a joke”, I said “Are you kidding me?”.
“No!” He said, “Turn inward, you’ll become free!
You’ve made your own boundaries inside your mind,
You’ve closed your eyes and think you’ve become blind”.

I said, “How can I get out of this trap?
I want to find the way, give me the map”
He said, “You’re the way, the truth and the life!
Be still and know you’re that, and end this strife!

You’re not your body and you’re not your mind;
Not knowing the timeless truth makes you blind;
You’re not your story and you’re not your thoughts;
You’re not those age old, buried mental knots.

You’re not that chattering voice in your head;
You’re not anything that you did or said;
You’re not anything that you have or know
You’re the truth that is watching all this show!

You’re not anything that can be perceived;
You’re not an object that can be observed;
You’re the screen where the world is being played;
You’re the emptiness where the form is made.

You’re the one witnessing the mind and breath;
You’re one without two, beyond birth and death;
Like the air trapped in a small round bubble,
You feel separate which brings all the trouble.

Inquire inside and wake up from this dream!
Let truth alone shine like a bright white beam!
By inquiry, your illusions will break;
You’ll stop mistaking the rope for a snake”

Hearing these words stopped my thoughts for a while.
Looking in, I slowly began to smile.
I watched my thoughts as they slowly passed by;
I observed my mind like a secret spy.

For years, I contemplated on his words;
I watched my thoughts fly like a bunch of birds.
One day, I woke up and realized the truth;
Since then my life has been peaceful and smooth!